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Look in the mirror and what do you see? Parenting poem

Yesterday I saw a comment of Facebook from the lovely Karin from Cafe Bebe. Which basically said ‘Do you look in the mirror and sometimes wonder who it is that is looking back and you?

This morning I remembered this poem by Janthea Bridgen. We were given it when I did a parenting course when Bex was 4 and Oz was 2. It remained in my folder on my book shelf as it also has my job application in for my job as a Mum. Perhaps I will share that with you soon, and maybe I shall re-write one for now nearly ten years on!!! Parenting is quite a different game ten years on I can tell you! :-)

So here the poem.

Reflection of a Parent

I look in the mirror and what do I see?
I see a stranger staring at me.
Somebody’s mother, somebody’s wife,
somebody’s daughter but nobody’s life.

Who was I? Who am I? And who will I be?
I plead with the stranger who’s staring at me.
Did I ever know? I just can’t re-call.
Somehow that seems the most painful of all.

In punishment now for years of neglect,
no caring, no self-loving and little respect.
I search and I search but remorselessly see
only a stranger staring at me.

Yet in the eyes if I look long and deep
a slight recognition of dreams still asleep.
A five year old child, ten year old sage,
a youth full of vision, passion and rage.

So as I gaze, I silently vow
to renew our acquaintance starting from now.
As for my children the lesson will be,
look in the mirror and love who you see.

By Janthea Bridgen

For me being a parent has been the best thing I have ever done. Despite sometimes it being tough, years and years of sleepless nights in fact when you add the years up it totals nearly 11 as Oscar didn’t sleep through the night till nearly 9 years old. I do still have the dark circles to show for it!!! Then over the years we have had to deal with the fall out of unresolved bullying. With the last 7 months being my worst parenting nightmare again from the echo of bullying and school sadly not doing their jobs properly. But after those long months with lots of outside support we have had a major breakthrough. A new start, a new look, a new outlook and things are looking great for my girl!

So lets look at that last paragraph. The last bit is easy and the lesson I always taught look in the mirror and love who you see. I am not sure it was heard though always but it is there in the background.

So as I gaze, I silently vow to renew our acquaintance starting from now.

I know in this last year along the way I have lost lots of things. My sister who despite lots of crying I know I have to do a lot more but I also want to make her proud of me. I so nearly felt I had lost my daughter but she is back stronger than ever and then myself. My confidence has taken a battering, my smile is not completely there and as I type this and I am crying because some how I need to find these and get them back. As I know that life can been incredibly short and it shouldn’t be wasted.

So as I type, I will not so silently vow to renew our acquaintance starting from now.
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10 Responses to "Look in the mirror and what do you see? Parenting poem"

  1. Kerry says:

    Darling Sweets………….. sending you big hugs, kisses, cake and loves. Wish you could come Over For A Cuppa :) (see what I did there) Crying is good, you’ll feel amazeballs after a good crying sesh. kisses kisses kisses xxxxxxxx

    1. Ali says:

      Ha, you made me start again!!! Yes I did what you did then and on a Bank holiday Monday, impressed I am :-) Yes, I feel I need to cry a lot more and I will better for it too. Thanks for stopping by, I truly almost felt the hug, thank you x x x x x

  2. Bless you Ali! We do lose ourselves don’t we?? Let’s all help ourselves remember hey?? I’m sitting in our garden, in the sun with a cuppa…amazing how much it helps! Have a great day sweetie.

    Karin :) xx

    1. Ali says:

      Very easy to lose yourself on the way for sure. I am about to have late breakfast in the garden, though have been up for hours, honest!!! Then bike ride and picnic lunch with Oz in the sun :-) x x x

  3. Great poem that I can totally relate to. I think when your kids are younger it is so easy to forget who you are. You can become so involved in your kids needs that you no longer make your self-care a priority. But thankfully I have learnt my lesson and realised that a happy mum who cares for herself is a much better mum than a burnt out mum!

    1. Ali says:

      Totally agree. A burnt out Mum is good to no-one though usually we learn the hard way, don’t we? :-) I love the poem but right now the end verse is shouting at me x

  4. Margaret Ralph says:

    Hi there Ali, read the poem, know the sentiment all too well. I too have had to find me, and it has taken a while, but I am the relish. You will find you when you start to believe in yourself. Your sister was and will be proud of you, even though a whisper away. Big hug goes out to you and your family. Things can only get better. X Margaret

    1. Ali says:

      Thank you Margaret, I am glad you found yourself. I think I did then the last year have been lost on the way. But you are right it has a lot to do with believing in yourself x Thanks for commenting X

  5. Margaret Ralph says:

    That should read “there ish” not relish, oops.lol

    1. Ali says:

      Ha! Ahhh your an ‘ish’ person too!!!

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